Faq Part 5

FAQ for newsgroup uk.rec.sheds, version 2&2/7th 1999-11-08 (roughly)

Ride of the Shedheads Theme Tune

Part 5 of 8 : Other stuff, and recipe


Ronald Hawke was to be a benefactor from the group after his shed had
been stolen from his allotment in Hertford. The group had managed to
raise the replacement cost in pledges only to find out that a
replacement had already been donated some weeks earlier. In true shed
style we never did get a round tuit.

The Second Law of Thermodynamics is our favourite bit of physics: it
tells us that disorder always increases, and is often employed to
explain the state of our shed shelves to the wife (speaking of which we
hear Ed's wife looks rather winsome in oily overalls and is a bit sheddy

There are some very sheddy books about. One in particular is Stephen
Pile's "Book of Heroic Failures", and then there's anything by
Tim Hunkin. "Blokes and sheds", by Mark Thomson ISBN 0 207 18916 1 is a look at the
Australian approach to the craft.

Some have claimed that there's a link between sheds and masculinity.
Others point out the similarities between sheds and wombs (low light,
separation from the world, a supply of comforts, etc) and, with Freud,
believe sheds to be essentially feminine: a retreat to a shed is an
exteriorisation of the unconscious desire to return to the womb.

"Official Items?"

There have been several nominations for Official Shed Day. None are
entirely satisfactory, but there's always the anniversary of the day
the newsgroup was created (see above).

Official drink is brown ale - once widely popular, nowadays my local
Tesco has only Newcastle Brown, which is something of a special case.
There are some good ones about though: Manns Original for starters.
Lager? How's a rat going to cross the yeast crust if the yeast's at the
bottom?, eh?, answer me that you young whippersnapper.
SOBAR, the Society Of Brown Ale Rivivalists, have the IcePie Book of
Brown Ale at http://www.man.ac.uk/~zlsiida/sobar/
Jon Guite's infamous nettle beer recipe is at
coz I wanted it nearer than a Netscape bookmark away, just in case.
And in case you need an excuse to go down the pub (I HAVE to go,
dear, it's his birthday, he'll be upset if I don't), there's a list of
birthdays of the denizens of uk.rec.sheds (and half their families and
pets...) at http://www.man.ac.uk/~zlsiida/sheds/birthdays

Official euphemism for death is: "his shed door was finally closed"
Thanks to: Stuart@StuartD.demon.co.uk (Stuart Davies)

Official insecticide is nitrogen tri-iodide, though you can't really
spray your plants with it as it deals with insects by blowing them to

Official shed clothing: A cardy with holes is nice. One of those brown
warehouse coats cuts a dash. Overalls can be very flattering: see Ed's
wife. You can't go far wrong with something that has lots of pockets,
especially if some of them are unusually shaped and/or have holes in

Official shed food: pork pie (optional pickled cabbage side dish), with
(of course) brown ale.

Offical shed biscuit: Undecided but there's nowt you can tell us about
dunking 'em - we're all experts in this field.

Now this seems like a good time for another [INTERMISSION]

From: Richard Yates
Subject: Cor! Paste! Contains XXX strong language!
But all in a good cause. None of the below has been ROT-ed.
Raised paste, or more properly paste for raised pies, is of a
special consistency so that it can be moulded or 'raised' and it
will hold its shape without the support of such things as flan
tins or pie dishes.

Start in the same way as for short paste - rub the fat into the
flour, but using 1/2 the water. So, for 1lb. of plain flour, take
1/2lb. of lard and about 1/2 a teacupful (1/8 pt.) of water. Rub
the fat, in pieces, into the flour, then add the water, and
manipulate it to make it all cohere.

Now comes the most important part of all. Knead the paste. It
must be kneaded (on a floured surface) for several minutes, to
develop the gluten in the flour. It will begin to feel quite
rubbery[1], or springy[2].

If you use too much water, the paste will be too slack, and won't
stand up. If you add too little, it will remain friable.

Cut 1 1/2 lb. of lean pork into very small pieces, reserving any
fat, gristle, or skin (for stock). Put the meat into a bowl and
just cover with water. Add spices (esp. pepper), mix well and

Take 1/3 of the dough and roll it out 1/4" thick. Cut four
circles from this with a fluted 2-in. pastry cutter. These will
be the lids.

Knead the leftover dough back into the rest, and divide into four
equal parts. Roll these into balls.

For each of the dough balls, put the ball on a floured surface,
and proceed to hammer it around the edge, using the edge of
your hand, turning it round and round as you do so (keep it the
same way up) until a 'brim' forms all around and the thing
resembles a solid 'hat'.

Now, take a half-pint Brown Ale bottle (empty this first for
safety), flour the outside, set one of the dough 'hats' crown-
downwards on a floured board, and press the bottom into the
middle of it. As you keep pressing, the 'brim' will curl upwards
and inwards.

Continue to turn it round and round on the floured board, and
mould it gently around the bottle as a potter moulds his clay
upon the wheel, and gradually the dough will rise up the sides of
your bottle. Every so often, remove the bottle and flour the
inside of the dough to prevent sticking. When the sides are about
3" deep, you have your finished 'jar' of raised paste.

When you have completed the other 'hats', fill them with the
spiced meat, which will be quite wet. Do not add any more water.
Moisten the edges of the lids, and put them on. Pinch around the
edges to join them properly. Paint the tops of the pies with
beaten egg for a golden finish.

Tie a cummerbund of greased grease-proof paper around each pie,
and let an air-hole into the top.

Bake at Gas Mark 6 (400F) for 1/2 an hour. Reduce the heat to GM
1/2 (250F) for another 1 1/2 hours.

Make the stock into jelly with gelatine, and pour some (hot) into
the top of each (cold) pie. When the jelly has set, remove the
grease-proof paper.